Category Archives: Movie Reviews

Iron Man 3

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(We are restoring and updating the site following a nasty hack attack. Please excuse the very basic look while we fix things up).

For Tony Stark, (Robert Downey Jr.), life has become very complicated for the self-proclaimed genius, philanthropist, billionaire, and playboy.  In the new film “Iron Man 3”, Stark is wracked by insomnia and dread following the battle he waged to save New York in “The Avengers”.

Stark throws himself into his work and endlessly creates new Iron Man suits as well as system upgrades which currently have him at the Mark 42 version which is a huge jump from the Mark VII I was last seen in which was itself a prototype.

When a terrorist named The Mandarin (Sir Ben Kingsley), has unleashed a series of bizarre bombings on the world and has opening challenged the President (William Sadler), Stark is caught up in his own fears, most notably protecting his beloved Pepper (Gwyneth Paltrow).

When his friend Happy (John Farveau) is caught in an explosion, Stark openly challenges the Mandarin which results in a devastating helicopter upon Stark and Potts.  With the world thinking he has died, Stark sets out to stop the Mandarin at all costs and find a way to battle his inner demons and fears to save the ones he loves and do what he knows is right.

The movie is big on laughs and character as we see a more well-rounded Stark this time out. He is haunted by demons of his past yet committed to improving himself and doing what is right.  The film takes a bit of time to get up to speed, but thanks to Downey’s performance you maintain your interest as you are always waiting for what he will do next as he is in total command of the character and never lets the quirks or humor of his situation overshadow his humanity or undermine his performance.

I would have liked to have seen Downey is his armor more kicking butt and taking names, but thankfully the finale is very enjoyable.  The converted 3D in the film is very good as although I am not a fan of 3D conversions this was the best I have seen to date as ash, snow, and debris did seem to float into the audience the way it does in films that are shot properly in the new 3D technology.

The supporting cast for the film is very strong especially Kingsley and Guy Pearce and I enjoyed the effort that Writer/Director Shane Black put into allowing the characters time to grow.  I was a bit disappointed that Don Cheadle was not given a lot to do in his role especially when playing Iron Patriot/War Machine.  The battle at the end of “Iron Man 2” where he and Iron Man took on legions of bad guys had me hoping for more this time out.

That being said, this is a very enjoyable summer movie that shows the franchise is not slowing down or taking the easy road out.  There has been discussion that Downey Jr. may step away after the next Avengers film but hopefully that is not to be the case as I could not imagine another actor capturing the role as perfectly as he has.

Following a bonus post credits scene, we are told in the best James Bond style that Tony Stark will return, and you can bet legions of fans will be waiting.

4 stars out of 5.

Pain and Gain

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(We are repairing from a Site Hack and Doing Updates. Please Excuse The Mess)

By Ryan Guerra

Michael Bay’s latest film Pain and Gain suffers from a bit of performance anxiety. It starts hot and flashy, becomes humorous and then starts to drag as it realizes it needs to actually deliver. This is unfortunate because if Bay focused on delivering an entertaining movie from start to finish he may have succeeded. Instead we are constantly reminded by expository text on screen and one of the five unnecessary voiceovers that “sometimes the facts are stranger than fiction.” And the facts are that we get a film here that starts out as a comedy, evolves into a kidnapping/extortion story with a few more jokes only to end with minimal action and no redeeming opportunities for our protagonists. Plus the final jokes or shock opportunities are lost in the fact that our main characters become less and less likeable as the story evolves.

Mark Wahlberg plays body-builder and trainer Daniel Lugo, a self-described “doer” who is tired of working hard only to never reach the level of success that many of his rich clients have achieved. Fed up with his everyday life of being broke, Logo decides it is time to take what he thinks should be his. Together with the help of his roided-out, impotent employee Adrian (Anthony Mackie) and ex-con who found Jesus Paul (Dwayne Johnson), the trio decide to kidnap and extort the jerk off wealthy client Victor (Tony Shalhoub) for everything thing he has. The hilarity ensues while it’s obvious that these muscle heads do not have to smarts to pull off this elaborate plan other than what they have seen in the movies.

It should be noted here that Wahlberg is once again great as a character that does not possess a lot of smarts. Mackie delivers another solid character performance to add to his resume but it is Johnson who steals the show. In a movie where at first glance his physique fits right in, it is his softer more emotional side that shows some range that we have never seen from him before. He plays an ex-con who is determined to change his life only to be slowly sucked back into the lifestyle that put him in jail in the first place. Johnson’s emotional range has him delivering perhaps his best performance ever.

Eventually these three break Victor and take everything he has and they start to live out their dreams. But like all things that take no skill or real effort to earn, the three squander their new found wealth and go looking for another target. All while Victor hires a private detective (Ed Harris) to help bust the trio as the local cops do not believe that some muscle heads could pull off the elaborate heist.

And here is where the film starts to fall apart. The three main characters start to change from fun loving hard working characters to bad guys. The things they do to gain their wealth are repulsive and it stops being funny. Victor is a terrible character that is hard to like in the first place, so you do not really feel bad for him when he loses everything. It is just that you do not really feel happy for our anti-heroes either. And when the story enters its third act after dragging through the second, it feels rushed to close out the film as the gang decides to make a run at another wealthy target.

Furthermore, every character get his/hers own voice over. Seriously, what is the point? It is one thing for Wahlberg to have his own narration as he is the main character, however even Harris gets his own character development through dialogue. It makes the story disjointed and made me feel unsure about who or what I should be rooting for.

In the end I walked out of the theater feeling like we watched two different movies. A rags-to-riches comedy in the beginning that morphs into an unfunny crime drama by the end that has to remind you again and again that you are watching something that is based on a true story. It is a shame because I enjoyed the beginning of this film. I wish that Bay would have taken even additional liberties to make a more consistent film from start to finish on what was already a loosely based true story in the first place.

3 out of 5 stars

Oblivion

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By Gareth Von Kallenbach
(Site is under updates, please excuse our basic look at this time.
60 years removed from a devastating alien attack, upon the earth a technician named Jack (Tom Cruise), tools away protecting machinery that is essential to the survival of the human race.  With only his companion Victoria (Andrea Riseborough), for company the duo form an effective team according to the company.
In the new film “Oblivion”, it is learned that while humanity won the war, the aftermath was left the earth largely uninhabitable.  As a result, the survivors have fled to the moon of Titan or are awaiting transit aboard gigantic space station Earth orbit.
Jack and Victoria watch over gigantic extractors that process seawater for much-needed resources for the fusion reactors of humanity.  Their only link to the outside world is through communication with the orbiting space station and they efficiently set about their task of repairing guard drones and monitoring water processors from any threats.
With only two weeks to go before they can join the others on Titan Jack is troubled by images of a woman and another life.  He dismisses this at first due to the fact that both he and Victoria had memory wipes in order to provide security for their assignment.
After following Jack through his various patrols he discovers the remaining pocket of alien resistance has managed to bring down and orbiting spacecraft filled with passengers in cryogenic suspension.  Despite company orders Jack decides to intervene and manages to save one of the passengers from destruction by security drone.  He is shocked to discover that the woman is the same one that he’s been dreaming about and is even further confused by the fact that she seems to know him.
This discovery does not sit well with Victoria and is not going to sit well with the company but despite this, Jack agrees to go with the survivor in order to retrieve a flight recorder from her downed ship.
This is where things really get twisted as Jack becomes a captive of the alien menace and learns that they are not what he had been led to believe.  Their mysterious leader (Morgan Freeman), proceeds to tell Jack that the life he has known it is a lie and proceeds to tell Jack of his plan to bring down the orbiting space station.
What follows is a very twisting and at times action-packed story that is awash in visual splendor.  Not only is “Oblivion” filled with incredible imagery but it is also a intriguing and at times thought-provoking story that proves you can do action driven science fiction and still have interesting characters with complexity and a branching story.
Cruise is very good in the role of Jack and he deftly combines the humanity and sense of wonder of this character very well with the action scenes.  Jack is not just a man of action he is a deeper and more complicated individual that appreciates the way the world used to be and things such as music and nature as well as possessing a fierce sense of duty.
While the ending may have been a bit too Hollywood for my liking and I was able to figure out the plot twists ahead of time, the journey was still a very enjoyable one at one that I would suggest taking for yourself.
4 stars out of 5

42

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“42”

By Diana Sanchez

“42” is more than just a baseball movie.  It is a meaningful, intense story about how one of the greatest baseball players of all time, Jackie Robinson, created real change in the heart of major league baseball and in American hearts.  I think that “42” is Harrison Ford’s best role.  Ford plays the role of Branch Rickey, the owner of the Brooklyn Dodgers, whose idea it was to choose a player from the Negro league and offer him a spot on his team.  Rickey goes against everyone’s opinions and butts heads with other team managers and executives across the league but his belief in Robinson’s potential never waivers.  Rickey is a determined baseball executive who sprinkles humor in between his stubbornness to get what he wants.

Robinson, played by Chadwick Boseman, experiences tough opposition and resistance from players and coaches across the league and from players within his own team.  All he wants to do is play baseball for the Brooklyn Dodgers but it seems almost impossible in 1947 during a time of segregation and racism.  Robinson is depicted as a man who plays with real heart and integrity.  We get a glimpse into his personal life and see that he lives with as much integrity as he plays his game.  I found myself sobbing unexpectedly at both happy and sad moments throughout the movie.  The racial epithets and harsh comments aimed at Robinson were tough to watch and reminded me that the 40’s really was not that long ago. There are many great exchanges between Robinson and his wife and the confrontations between Robinson and other players and Rickey are equally moving

because the dialogue was just that good.

“42”is a special story that will touch the heart and inspire.  The audience in my theatre applauded several times and I think younger viewers can learn a lot about what baseball, and America, was really like in the 40’s.  If you aren’t a baseball fan going into the movie, you will be before it’s over.  I can’t wait to see it again!

4.5 stars

Jurassic Park 3D

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Back in 1993, Director Steven Spielberg brought the highly popular novel
Jurassic Park to the big screen and in doing so, created a box office
smash and a pop culture classic.

The follow up movies were not as successful as the original, but still did
big business and paved the way for the next film in the series which is
currently in production.

Since the last film in the series arrived back in 2001, many fans had
wondered why there has been such a long delay bringing the new film to
audiences, and this has been attributed mainly to Universal wanting to be
respectful following the passing of series creator Michael Crichton and
the desire to do a new film right so it can hopefully launch a new
trilogy.

With the arrival of the new 3D technology, studios are going back to
convert classic films to 3D as we have already had “Titanic”, “Top Gun”,
and “Star Wars: The Phantom Menace” be re-released with a shiny new 3D
conversion.

For those unfamiliar with the story, it follows Dr. Alan Grant (Sam Neil),
a dinosaur expert who is hired by his wealthy underwriter, John Hammond
(Richard Attenborough), to provide his expert endorsement of a new type of
animal preserve in Costa Rica.

Accompanied by fellow scientists Dr. Ellie Satler (Laura Dern), and Chaos
Theory expert Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum), the group journey to the group
travel to the lush island and discover that the impossible has happened.
Hammond and his team of scientists have brought dinosaurs back to life by
means of cloning recovered strands of DNA.

It is disclosed that the investors of the attraction dubbed “Jurassic
Park” are nervous about the safety of the park following the death of a
worker at the hands of a dinosaur. It is hoped that the endorsement of the
experts will allay the fears of the investors and allow them to open as
planned and experience the fame and fortune their creations will bring.
Naturally things do not go as planned thanks to a less than honest
employee and a big storm and before long, the creatures are loose and
causing death and destruction wherever they go.

Grant and the fellow guests must use all of their skills to survive in the
chaotic world they have found themselves in.

“Jurassic Park 3D” does not try to include things like new footage,
enhanced CGI, or other gimmicks. Aside from the 3D conversion, it is the
same film that captivated audiences upon it’s initial release and it was
amazing to see it back on the big screen even though we own the series on
DVD and Blu-ray.

The 3D at the start of the film was evident, but it quickly faded for me
as the film went along. I have long been an outspoken critic of
post-converting film into 3D as there is a night and day difference
between films that were shot in 3D and those that were converted in a lab.
Although the conversion process has gotten much better in recent years it
still pales to what a film properly shot in the new 3D technology can
offer.

3D requires not only a specific set of cameras, but different lighting and
angles for best results. A film that is intended for conversion can get a
jump on the process by shooting with a mind towards 3D conversion but a
twenty year old film that was never intended for 3D will have some serious
limitations.

Some in the audience at the conclusion of our screener commented that they
thought there would be more 3D in the film but liked seeing it again on
the big screen. I loved seeing it on an IMAX screen and enjoying the
tremendous visuals of the film as well as the great soundtrack being
played through a top of the line system.

The 3D for me was a disappointment as time went on, I realized that
watching the film via Blu-ray at home on our big screen provided and
enjoyable enough experience.

For die hard fans of the series and those who want younger viewers to
experience the film on the big screen, then this is exactly what you have
been looking for. If you are looking for a significant change to the film,
then you may be disappointed. Which makes the review all that much
tougher as I am not so much writing a review of the film but rather a
review of the film as it is presented in 3D.

3 stars out of 5.

The Place Beyond The Pines

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By Joseph K. Saulnier

I really wanted to sit at my computer tonight and write about how much I disliked this movie. I was practically begging people to go with me, but no one wanted to. So I ended up going on my own. The only thing I really knew about this film going into it was that it was from Derek Cianfrance, the writer/director of “Blue Valentine”. I didn’t care much for BV, and so my hopes were not high for “The Place Beyond the Pines”, but actually, Pines surprised me.

Pines is the story of two men on opposite sides of the law, just trying to do the right thing and how what they do impacts each other’s lives, and the lives of their sons. Of course the means by which they got to the “right thing” was not always the “right way”, but ultimately they were trying to good.

Ryan Gosling plays “Heart Throb” Luke Glanton, a stunt motorcycle rider with a traveling circus. We open on him doing his thing in Schenectady, New York, and after his performance he sees Romina (“Roe”, portrayed by Eva Mendes). You can tell these two have history, as though they met the last time his little side show burned through town. Cutting through the awkwardness, Luke finds out that Roe had a kid. His kid, Jason. Though, he didn’t find out from her. Determined to make things right, despite Roe having moved on being with another man, Luke sticks around Schenectady to try and be part of his son’s life and to win Roe from her man. Only things don’t begin moving fast enough for him, and so turns to robbing banks in this small town as a way to provide for his lover and their newborn child. Only things go south fairly quickly and this puts him on a collision course with an ambitious rookie cop.

Bradley Cooper plays Avery Cross; a rookie cop on the force all of six months. After a harrowing deed that puts takes him off duty for several months and causes him so serious psychological issues which make it hard for him to even look at his son, Avery Jr. After his recovery, Avery returns to the force only to be thrust into a den of corrupt cops, gangs and a genuine fear for his life. He is not sure how to react at first, but eventually knows that he must do the right thing… even if it means ratting out his brothers in arms. This doesn’t prove to be an easy course for him, but he is determined to do the right thing, despite it tearing his family apart.

Act one of this film focuses on Gosling and Mendes’ characters and their tumultuous relationship. When they first brought Mendes on screen, I was really questioning the casting choice. By the end of the act, those questions were still there. It just didn’t seem like Gosling and Mendes had the chemistry that the makers of the film were desperately trying to portray. But we do see a lot into the character of Luke and how much he really just wants to be there for his son. Gosling did an excellent job with the role, but I feel like there was thing that was distracting from his performance: his hair. For some reason they decided bleach blond was the way to go to this character, but mostly what I was thinking when he was on screen was that it just looked out of place and I really had to concentrate to get past it.

Act two focuses on Bradley Cooper and the turmoil he goes through. I can’t say too much without giving away some major plot points of the film, but Bradley Cooper definitely did an excellent job playing the young rookie cop. He has an excellent supporting cast for his act with Harris Yulin playing his father, Rose Byrne as his wife and Bruce Greenwood as the District Attorney. He eventually manages to get from underneath all the lies, coercion and corruption to make a bid for an Assistant District Attorney position.

Fast forward to 15 years later, and this is where our act three takes place. Only now we are focusing on the lives of young Jason and Avery Jr. The deeds of their fathers in yester year, portrayed in our first two acts, affect our young subjects as they become friends without realizing the history between their families. I felt that Dane DeHaan who portrayed a 17-year old Jason knocked it out of the park with his performance. But there is something left to be said for Emory Cohen who is on screen as Avery Jr.

Want to know the rest? Watch the movie. Acts one and two, though long winded at points, blew me out of the water. Cianfrance did an excellent job of captivating the audience and making you care for the two focus points, despite them being on completely different sides of the law (as mentioned earlier). Act three, however, fell kind of flat to me. It very well could be a result of a poor casting choice in Emory Cohen, but I also felt like they could have shaped the end of this tail into so much more.

Overall, I actually enjoyed the movie, despite a lackluster ambition to go see it. Would I have gone to see it on my own if I had to pay for it? Nah! But it is a good date movie and might possibly start some interesting conversations between you and your partner.

4 stars out of 5

Evil Dead

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By Tracey Barrientos


One of the greatest horror movies of all time would have to be “The Evil Dead” which had been spawned by Sam Raimi and his original short film “Within the Woods”. “Within the Woods” was filmed with the intent of gaining investors to collaborate on a full length film starring the then unknown God of “B” horror movies Bruce Campbell. “The Evil Dead” and its predecessor “Within the Woods” was meant to be serious and horrifying, though that proved to be hard with a smaller budget that Raimi and Campbell had originally hoped for. Little did they know that Evil Dead would become one of the largest trilogies in cult film histories.

Based on Raimi’s original 1981 script, five young adult friends set out on a short vacation in a remote cabin in the woods. Whilst reading from a book that was obviously supposed to stay hidden, one of them ends up summoning dormant demons that end up causing havoc among the group. Killing them off one by one. Though the aura of the film is somewhat similar to the original, we all know that with remakes there are always some differences. In the original the five friends go to a cabin for a care free fun filled weekend the remake centers around one friend trying to kick her drug habits “cold turkey” with the help of her three friends and older brother.

The cinematography of the film is one hundred times better (remember in the original; Bruce running from the “deadite” and you could see the lights in the rafters of the studio “that does not happen in this film”). The remake pays homage to the original in certain respects and can be spotted throughout the film if you are a true “Evil Dead” fanatic. Unlike the original movie that had been filmed in Tennessee the remake was filmed in its entirety in New Zealand. The recreation of the cabin is almost uncanny with a couple of differences here and there. As expected the special FX are much better with a bigger budget and the advancement of technology. Like the original the actors are not well known and only have done a couple other projects. The cast was well selected and the acting was much better.

If you are a true fan of the original film you may like or dislike it. I myself found it to be entertaining however it doesn’t come close to the original film. If you’ve never seen the original you may like this movie based on its own merits. I must add if you’ve never seen the original film shame on you. To all Evil dead and/or Bruce Campbell fans I can not disclose to you if Bruce makes a cameo but I will say this stay till the end of the credits and you may feel pretty groovy.

3 out of 5 bloody stumps.

Check out our audio interview with Director Fede Alvarez

Evil Dead Interview

The Host

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In Stephanie Meyer’s adult sci-fi novel “The Host”, Melanie is one of the few remaining humans on Earth who hasn’t been physically taken over by a Soul. Souls are parasitic aliens that are surgically implanted into humans and take over the host body. In most cases, all that remains of the human are their memories. But not in Melanie’s case. Pursued by human-hunting Souls called “Seekers”, Melanie (Saoirse Ronan) launches herself out of a window to escape capture, but miraculously survives the fall to be captured anyway. In the hands of the aliens, Melanie is implanted with a Soul called “Wanderer” who finds herself fighting internally with her host who is alive and well in the Wanderer’s head.

It’s Wanderer’s job to dig through Melanie’s memories to find out where other humans, like Melanie’s brother Jamie and boyfriend Jared are hiding. Melanie is uncooperative and Wanderer is soon convinced she needs to be removed from Melanie’s body. But no one wants the information on the humans more than the head Seeker (Diane Kruger). Neither Melanie nor Wanderer trust Seeker to not replace Wanderer with herself, so Melanie/Wanderer escape to find a Healer who can remove Wanderer from Melanie. On the way, Melanie convinces Wanderer to help her find her Uncle Jeb whom Melanie, Jamie and Jared had been seeking before Melanie was captured.

It’s Uncle Jeb who eventually discovers his lost and dehydrated niece and takes her to his hideout, a network of caves inside an inactive volcano that houses about 3 dozen humans. There Melanie is reunited with her little brother and her boyfriend, but is soundly rejected by her Jared when he realizes she’s host to a Soul. Wanderer has to win the humans trust, which is difficult, to say the least, when all the humans want to do is kill her. This includes a boy named Ian who, after attempting to choke Wanderer to death, finds himself attracted to Wanderer, much to Jared and Melanie’s consternation.

If this review hasn’t put you to sleep already, congratulations! There’s a slight chance then that you’ll make it through the movie. While Ronan plays Melanie/Wanderer beautifully, hers was the only performance that had some semblance of emotion. Even John Hurt, who plays Uncle Jeb, looked like he had just enough energy and interest to utter a few words simply for laughs. Jared, played by Max Irons (yes, Jeremy’s son) is adequately sigh-worthy, as indicated by the teens present, and so is Ian, played by Jake Abel albeit in a less brooding manner.

While the Souls are supposed to be a peaceful race, Kruger’s Seeker is deadly intent on finding Wanderer. This is the film’s only true conflict and it’s lackluster at best. One moviegoer who read the book said the movie followed the novel closely, but the movie did away with quite a few ancillary characters. I think my husband said it best when he told me, “I never thought I’d utter these words, but Twilight was better.” Just like Twilight rewrote vampire and werewolf mythology, The Host tries to portray the story’s aliens as harmless, peaceful invaders. For someone who grew up with the Alien franchise, I think it was difficult for my husband to accept the delicate, fluttery, dandelion-esque Souls and their “peaceful” assault on Earth, much less the awkward teenage love triangle. Or square, rather.

Not having read the book yet, I went into the movie with little more than a synopsis of the plot. I had no expectations so I wasn’t terribly disappointed by the movie but I must admit I struggled more than usual to stay awake. Most of those in the audience who read the book seemed okay with its theatrical adaptation but that’s just it. No one was wowed and there was an almost tangible malaise to the crowd as we exited the theater. These advance screeners are promoted to create buzz, and good movies literally have that excited buzz as the audience exits the theater. The only buzz after this movie was the static caused by the slow shuffle of feet as we piled out of the theater. If you’re a true Meyer fan, I’m sure there’s no stopping you from catching this movie but if you’re not, there’s really no compelling you to watch.

2 out of 5

G.I. Joe: Retaliation

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By Joseph K. Saulnier

Who didn’t grow up as a child of the eighties and nineties and not play with G.I. Joes? And of those, who can honestly say they were not thoroughly disappointed in G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra? Surprisingly, I can say that I wasn’t thoroughly disappointed, but I know the movie could have been so much more than it was. Could it have done without the surreal technology, the sappy love story and the unrealistic action scenes in the movie? Yes. Many fans cried out about this. G.I. Joe: Retaliation set out to respond.

Did they succeed? That’s debatable, but they did a lot of things right in the go-around. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not award winning or anything, and you should never expect a movie like this to be that. But let’s run through a check list. Sappy out of place love-story: gone. Surreal technology: less. Let’s face it, despite what some people felt about the first movie, it did kind of set that precedent. Retaliation is considered a true follow up to The Rise of Cobra. So would it honestly make any sense to go from one extreme of nearly impossible gadgets to none at all? Absolutely not. Besides, the cartoon series also had technology in it. I am not trying to defend the use of it, and there were some pretty crazy gadgets going on in this movie, but it seemed to jive better with what I remember of it as a kid. And they found a really unique way to tone it down without it not seeming right. Unfortunately, there is still a fair amount of unrealistic action in this movie, but that’s kind of become the norm for most action movies these days.

We pick up fairly close to where we left off in The Rise of Cobra. Duke (Channing Tatum) is now commanding a unit of the Joes with Roadblock, Lady Jaye, Flint and Snake Eyes (Dwayne Johnson, Adrianne Palicki, D.J. Cotrona and Ray Park respectively) under his command. The Joes are sent out on a mission, a good rapport is built between Duke and Roadblock, but then they go and destroy that when their convoy gets attacked by Cobra eliminating Duke from the rest of the film. Go cry spoiler somewhere else, this happens in the beginning of the movie, and it’s been everywhere since the delay of the movie from last year. I was hoping they would somehow managed to keep him in the movie, especially after seeing the chemistry between Tatum and Johnson, but alas…

So the convoy attacked, and all the Joes presumed dead. Only Roadblock, Jaye and Flint actually survive and try to get to the bottom of everything. Meanwhile President Zartan (remember how the last movie ended) is up to his own nefarious plans in breaking out Cobra Commander with the aide of Storm Shadow. The Joes work their magic, still have access to some technology (though not over the top like The Rise of Cobra), and recruit people to help them along the way, including the man who is the reason the Joes were started: General Joe Coulton (played epic-ly by Bruce Willis).

The movie was entertaining, had a lot of great and clever humor that wasn’t thrown in your face, and had some great action scenes (if you can get past the fact that in one scene they are fighting Cirque Du Soleil style on the side of a cliff). But it’s some of the little things in this movie that prevent it from redeeming the franchise after the first iteration, including the casting of RZA in a part that looks like it is meant to be serious, but his horrible acting make you really wonder if it was supposed to be a serious role or not. The other gripe I had with the movie was the unlikely resolution of the main conflict. With the Cobra Commander so confident in his plan, why would he, or any self-respecting super villain, deliver a way to foil the evil plan with literally half a second left on a silver platter. The last issue I had with the movie was Storm Shadow. I really liked the conflict between him and Snake Eyes in The Rise of Cobra, but they seemed to discredit his character a lot in this movie. Ultimately they changed the nature of Storm Shadow to make it seem as if he might switch sides in any future installments of the franchise, and that’s just not cool. The character was awesome the way he was.

As for the 3D aspect, it’s said this was the reason that the studio delayed the movie for a year. They wanted to add more effects to it. This tells me two things: the movie was shot in 2D and they had little faith in it. Honestly, I think we all know they tried to add more Duke to the movie in this time (which it’s really hard to tell if they did), but you can tell there was work done with 3D aspect. Too much. It was very distracting at points, and it seemed liked they added elements to scenes just to have 3D. For instance there was a scene where you were in a situation room viewing information on a monitor. It literally looked like they just super imposed a shoulder into the lower right of the screen so they could have in 3D as if you were looking over someone’s shoulder. That’s just silly.

All that being said. I had fun watching the movie. Dwayne Johnson is becoming a powerhouse that everyone was expecting him to years ago. I hope that he can continue this streak with some good movies (he’s got two more within the next month alone). I own the first one on Blu Ray, and I will probably buy this one when comes out as well. I would watch it in theater just for the enormity of the action on the big screen, but skip the 3D.

3.5 stars out of 5.

Admission

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By Amy-Jo Shriner

What’s the secret to getting in? Everyone wants to know this at some point in their lives, and to some extent Admission has the answer.

Tina Fey plays Portia, a Princeton admmissions officer. She has a very uneventful life; she lives with her very long time boyfriend and has worked for the university for sixteen years. Things are pretty set for Portia, she even has her eye on a promotion. This is when John Pressman (Paul Rudd) calls her to come to his alternative school to meet Jerimiah (Nat Wolff) a gifted student whose past would never get him into Princeton. Out of a competitive streak to try and get the promotion she goes to John’s school. John tells Portia he thinks she is Jerimiah’s birth mother and she pulls out all the stops trying to get Jerimiah admitted, to try and fulfill his dream. Along the way sparks fly between Portia and John.

Admission is a great movie, it has some interesting ideas about parenting and life in general. Tina Fey is totally believable as the woman in a rut who gets dumped and rebounds into a completely different life. Rudd is a wonderfully refreshing blend of a nice guy who makes, and can admit to making, mistakes. Perhaps my favorite character was Portia’s mother, Susannah (Lily Tomlin). Her take on feminist beliefs was hilarious. The story is solid too, for the most part. I would have questioned some things Portia just let slide. Other than that; its tale of growth, both tennager and adult is excellent.

So what’s the secret to getting in? Buy a movie ticket and find out.

4 stars out of 5

Olympus Has Fallen

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Two review For you on the film for you.

By Amy-Jo Shriner

Mike Banning (Butler) is a Secret Service agent in the Presidential detail, and it could be argued a friend to the President; he even lands a punch in an opening boxing practice. All of that changes when, during a horrible automobile accident, the President’s wife is killed. Mike couldn’t save them both, so he chose to save the President. After making “the right call”, as his director (Angela Bassett) tells him; the President just couldn’t stand to be reminded of the failure and moves Mike to the Treasury. Mike wants back into the detail, and he gets his chance when a Korean terrorist infiltrates the White House and all of the fail safes in place to keep an incursion from happening. Banning jumps into action and becomes the only one left/able to save the President and his son.

Admittedly I am a Gerard Butler fan. I see this character as a watered-down, but trying really hard, version of John McLane ala Die Hard. Except the one liners feel forced, not funny, as does the unwarranted use of foul language. A New York cop is one thing for cursing, but it just doesn’t feel right seeing it come out of a Secret Service Agent. Morgan Freeman does an excellent job portraying a man making the tough decisions as Speaker Trumbull (the acting President for much of the movie); he makes mistakes and corrects his actions based on those mistakes. Aaron Eckhart is ok as the President, but doesn’t have the gravity needed to really pull that level of authority off; he is very much an every-man version of the President. His relationship with his son and that of Banning’s and the President’s son is very believable and heartfelt.

While action packed and fast paced; the plot is wholly unbelievable. Maybe I’m just an arrogant American, but I highly doubt the sheer number of protocols that were breached would actually happen. It felt like Eckhart’s character was overriding them through the whole attack sequence. I actually could believe the amount of time it took to respond to the call, but I’ve been to the North Lawn, and could see the snipers from the street and on the surrounding buildings. The White House is just too protected to make an assault like the one depicted.

I enjoyed the movie as long as I didn’t think too much about what was actually happening.

3.5 out of 5

Second Review by Rebecca Fox

Finally a movie worth seeing! I think they could have come up with a better movie title but I digress. We start out by being introduced to some of the main players. Gerard Butler is Mike Banning, head of the Secret Service detail for the President of the United States, played by Aaron Eckhart. Banning’s character was believable, he was serious, but sweet and the camaraderie between him, the President and his family, and his fellow Secret Service co-workers was natural. This introduction was a slow build but it never felt sluggish, and ended up with President Asher demoting Banning to a desk job. Not because he was a horrible agent but because Banning reminds him of something he doesn’t want to remember. That will make more sense when you wee it.

Afterwards we are jumped to eighteen months from our introduction. Banning’s new desk job happens to have a great view of the White House, taunting him with the job he’ll never have again. The scenes with Banning’s wife, Leah, played by Radha Mitchell, were unnecessary but didn’t drag the movie down, only slightly helping towards making Banning seem like an everyman while revealing bits of his character and how hard it’s been for him to be sidelined. Bannign provides this all on his own.

One day while at work all hell breaks loose and the unthinkable happens, Olympus, code name for the White House, has ‘fallen’. The President and members of his senior staff have been taken hostage inside a bunker in the White House. Now, there are large parts in these takeover scenes that just would never happen, tactically and strategically but I have to say it didn’t matter. For me, being ex-military, I could spot almost all the inaccuracies and I still did not get pulled out of the entertainment.

Banning, seeing this from his work window immediately sets out to try and help. Naturally becoming the only eyes the Pentagon has inside. Just to clarify he doesn’t have ‘inside information’ as the previews say, he just is the man on the inside, the only one that can really be relied on. What ensues is entertaining and suspense filled, with a touch of humor. There are moments of sadness but more often moments where you want to stand up and applaud something that was said or done, it just pulls you in.

Morgan Freeman does a good job playing House Speaker, and acting President, Trumball. I did expect a little bit more from him, almost as if he wasn’t fully used, but it was still a great performance. Vouching for Banning in the Pentagon situation/war room is Secret Service Director Lynn Jacobs, played by Angela Bassett, she was believable as Banning’s cheering section and friend.

Finley Jacobsen did good playing Connor, the President’s son, as a child actor it’s harder for me to enjoy the performance but he didn’t annoy me so it worked. Ashley Judd played the Presidents wife Margaret Asher. Cole Hauser played Roma, the new head of the Secret Service detail for the President, an old co-worker, and Dylan McDermott played ‘retired’ Secret Service agent Forbes, also an old co-worker who now works private security. Melissa Leo, gave, at times, an inspirational performance as Secretary of Defense Ruth McMillan. Then there’s Rick Yune who plays Kang our bad guy. He and Banning had a subtle cat and mouse game almost the whole time that succeeded in creating tension. He did a really great job at making me hate Kang without trying to oversell that we are supposed to hate him.

The movie itself was a great pace, never too slow and the violence while graphic, is not gory or drawn out. You won’t miss anything if you don’t see it in theatres but I’d recommend it.

4 out of 5 stars.

The Croods

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by Ryan Guerra

When seeing the trailers for this film it seemed like so many other stories that have come before (Ice Age: Continental Drift for example). I figured that this was just the next shameless animated money grab by studios attempting to cash in on those parents who take their young children to each new animated film no matter what it is. That being said, the trailer for this film does not do it justice. Seriously, 20th Century Fox is doing Dreamworks Animation a disservice by not providing better trailers and promotion for The Croods. While the complete package of this film is not the best animated film, it is more than just a mere money grab.

The film opens with Eep, voiced by Emma Stone who introduces us to her cave family led by her overly protective father Grug (Nicolas Cage) and shares her rebellious desire to follow her curiosity and see more of the world. The scene quickly shifts to the family’s quest to find some food that plays like a fast paced prehistoric game of football that clues us in on each of the characters’ strengths and weaknesses. From this point forward the film does a fantastic job of keeping a steady pace that will keep both parents and young children’s interest. As I am sure most parents know, you can always tell how good a children’s movie is based on how fast the young ones lose interest and start to become fidgety. Right from the start, my girlfriend’s three year-old son was attentively glued to his seat. Also I did not notice any of the other children in the theater talking or making noise which is usually a sign of a good children’s film.

Keeping with the fast paced action we are introduced to Guy voiced by Ryan Reynolds. Guy is traveling to high ground in an effort to escape the end of the world caused by earthquakes and lava. Unlike The Croods who are simple minded cavemen, Guy has a brain and is constantly introducing the family to new ideas like fire, shoes and umbrellas. His adventurous spirit is a foil to Grug’s living in constant fear of the unknown in order to stay alive. And while the family starts to fall for Guy’s spirit, they go on an adventure not only to find safety but to finally live.

The voice acting is solid across the board. Emma Stone really shines as the rebellious teenager and Nicolas Cage gives one of his better performances in years. Ryan Reynolds is accompanied with his sloth sidekick “Belt” who provides some of the most memorable comedic moments in the film. Together, along with the other supporting actors in this film, you have several inspired performances. It is these performances that appeal to the adults in the audience and make the film memorable and fun for all ages.

3 ½ stars out of 5

The Host

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by Genevieve McBride

In Stephanie Meyer’s adult sci-fi novel “The Host”, Melanie is one of the few remaining humans on Earth who hasn’t been physically taken over by a Soul. Souls are parasitic aliens that are surgically implanted into humans and take over the host body. In most cases, all that remains of the human are their memories. But not in Melanie’s case. Pursued by human-hunting Souls called “Seekers”, Melanie (Saoirse Ronan) launches herself out of a window to escape capture, but miraculously survives the fall to be captured anyway. In the hands of the aliens, Melanie is implanted with a Soul called “Wanderer” who finds herself fighting internally with her host who is alive and well in the Wanderer’s head.

It’s Wanderer’s job to dig through Melanie’s memories to find out where other humans, like Melanie’s brother Jamie and boyfriend Jared are hiding. Melanie is uncooperative and Wanderer is soon convinced she needs to be removed from Melanie’s body. But no one wants the information on the humans more than the head Seeker (Diane Kruger). Neither Melanie nor Wanderer trust Seeker to not replace Wanderer with herself, so Melanie/Wanderer escape to find a Healer who can remove Wanderer from Melanie. On the way, Melanie convinces Wanderer to help her find her Uncle Jeb whom Melanie, Jamie and Jared had been seeking before Melanie was captured.

It’s Uncle Jeb who eventually discovers his lost and dehydrated niece and takes her to his hideout, a network of caves inside an inactive volcano that houses about 3 dozen humans. There Melanie is reunited with her little brother and her boyfriend, but is soundly rejected by her boyfriend when it’s discovered she’s host to a Soul. Wanderer has to win the humans’ trust, which is difficult, to say the least, when all the humans want to do is kill her. This includes a boy named Ian who, after attempting to choke Wanderer to death, finds himself attracted to her, much to Jared’s and Melanie’s consternation.

If this recap hasn’t put you to sleep already, congratulations! There’s a slight chance then that you’ll make it through the movie. While Ronan plays Melanie/Wanderer beautifully, hers was the only performance that had some semblance of emotion. Even John Hurt, who plays Uncle Jeb, looked like he had just enough energy and interest to utter a few words simply for laughs. Jared, played by Max Irons (yes, Jeremy’s son) is adequately teen sigh-worthy, as is Ian, played by Jake Abel, but in a less brooding manner.

While the Souls are supposed to be a peaceful race, Kruger’s Seeker is deadly intent on finding Wanderer. This is the film’s only true conflict and it’s lackluster at best. Others in attendance at the screener said the movie followed Stephanie Meyer’s novel of the same name closely, but the movie did away with quite a few ancillary characters. I think my husband said it best when he told me, “I never thought I’d utter these words, but Twilight was better.” Just like Twilight rewrote vampire and werewolf mythology, The Host tries to portray the story’s aliens as harmless, peaceful invaders. For someone who grew up with the Alien franchise, I think it was difficult for my husband to accept the delicate, fluttery, dandelion-esque Souls and their “peaceful” assault on Earth, much less the awkward teenage love triangle. Or square, rather.

Not having read the book yet, I went into the movie with little more than a synopsis of the plot. I had no expectations which means I wasn’t terribly disappointed by the movie but I must admit I struggled more than usual to stay awake. Most of those in the audience who read the book seemed okay with its theatrical adaptation but that’s just it. No one was wowed and there was an almost tangible malaise to the crowd as we exited the theater. If you’re a Meyer fan, I’m sure there’s no stopping you from catching this movie but if you’re not, there’s really no compelling you to watch.

2 out of 5

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone

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Back in the early 1980s, a young boy who found himself without friends and tormented by bullies was about to have an unexpected and life-changing experience. Alone on his birthday, the young boy opens his one gift from his mom and is delighted to find a magic kit and instructional video by reknowned magician Lance Holloway (Alan Arkin). His early attempts at magic gain him a new friend and the two become inseparable through their love and practice of magic.

Flash forward, and the two friends are now all the rage in the world of magic. Burt Wonderstone (Steve Carrell), and Anton Marvelton (Steve Buscemi), have packed their theater night after night with a dazzling mix of music, showmanship, and magic. Not only does this keep their boss (James Gandolfini) happy, but it allows Burt to enjoy all of the perks of being a Las Vegas headliner: fame, fortune, and women.

Ten years later it’s a different story for the two friends. While they still have a very popular show, creative differences between the two have arisen and Burt has become a very pompous and self-centered individual. He treats those around him with utter disdain and has driven off numerous assistants due to his behavior. The latest to join his group is Jane (Olivia Wilde), whom Burt sees as nothing more than a person to assist on stage to make him look good, and to succumb to his charms after the show. When a new street magician named (Jim Carrey), starts to become garner attention with his new and shocking routines, Burt and Anton’s routine is suddenly looking very stale in comparison. Anton devises a new trick to be played out in public that he hopes will propel the duo to a fresh and hip image, but sadly things go horribly wrong and the best friends have a bitter falling out. Literally.

Burt attempts to go on with the show alone, but his ego will not allow him to acknowledge the fact that Anton was a big part of the show and that the act depends on both of them. With his career suddenly over and with no money, Burt hits rock bottom and must find a way to regain his former glory. In doing so he will have to reinvent himself and undergo a magical transformation of his own.

The movie is an absolute delight and is so much more enjoyable and funnier than the trailers imply. Carrell has pulled off his best movie since “The 40 Year Old Virgin”, and infuses Burt with a likeability and sense of wonder despite his narcissism. Buscemi and Arkin are great in their supporting roles and Carrey seems to be enjoying every minute of playing the film’s bad guy as he gives a performance that while restrained when compared to some of his more over the top roles works very well with the ensemble cast.

The film is an unexpected find as it is a comedy that does not pander to base humor to get laughs and instead uses situational comedy and the characters to tell a charming story sprinkled with some solid laughs along the way, especially in the final moments of the film.

4 out of 5

Oz the Great and Powerful

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Taking on a movie as beloved as “The Wizard of Oz” is a daunting task. The iconic Judy Garland film is considered a classic and many of the songs from the film have remained part of our culture since it was released in 1939. Despite several book sequels, the attempts to continue the series have had little success as there have been animated films as well as an urban remake, “The Wiz”, which also failed to reach the success of the original. Director Sam Raimi opted to do an original prequel story that tells of how the fabled Wizard of Oz came to be.

Oz (James Franco), is a small-time magician toiling away in small circus in Kansas in 1905. Life on the road has allowed him to be a womanizer and an egomaniac who dreams of greatness. When his actions catch up with him, Oz is forced to flee and takes refuge from an angry mob in a hot air balloon. An unexpected storm funnel grabs the balloon, and whisks Oz to a dazzling and colorful world filled with all manner of strange creatures and wonders.
Upon his arrival, Oz is greeted by Theodora (Mila Kunis), who believes that Oz is the great wizard that legend has said will arrive to save the land and rule the people in a kind and just way. It is revealed that the land is under siege from a wicked witch, and a prophecy indicates a great wizard will arrive with the same name as the land, and will save the day.

Naturally Oz does not believe this but is more than willing to charm Theodora and her sister Evanora (Rachel Weisz), and plot to get his hands on the abundant gold that will come with his appointment as the great wizard. Oz learns that in order to take the throne, he has to defeat another witch (Michelle Williams), and sets off on a journey to the Dark Forest with his flying monkey companion Finley (Zach Braff). Along the journey, Oz learns first hand of the horrors the witch has unleashed on the unsuspecting and learns that his selfish behavior has serious consequences not just for himself, but for innocent people as well. This leads to some serious soul-searching and a confrontation that will force Oz to become the man that many believe he is, less they all perish.

The film has some great visuals as Raimi wisely shot the movie in 3D and mixed CGI with some very impressive sets. It is clear that much of the film is shot against a CGI backdrop but the visual wonder of the film is something to behold. The biggest issues I had with the film were that it was slow-paced and did drag in several parts. Franco does his best to play up the seedier side of Oz, but makes some very odd facial expressions throughout the film that seem very forced and out of place for the film and the situations he finds himself in. Kunis and Weisz make excellent witches and their backstory is a very interesting and an integral part of Dorothy’s adventures in the original film. Williams does well with her role but never seems to develop the needed chemistry with Franco. I was also surprised that the film was very light on musical numbers as there was only a hint of one that was quickly halted by Franco. “Oz: The Great and Powerful” is a visually enjoyable film that sets the stage well for the original film and Raimi is to be praised for taking on such sacred material and providing a new chapter for the modern generation. While it is not likely to be considered a classic like the original film, it is still a worthy chapter in the series which will provide good nostalgic entertainment for fans new and old alike.

3.5 stars out of 5.

Second Review by Joseph K Saulnier

Good; not great. Those were my thoughts immediately after seeing Oz, the Great and Powerful; those are still my thoughts as I write this.

Oz was shot in 3D, and they did a great job of not going too overboard with rubbing it in your face about it being 3D. This is a drawback to most 3D movies released these days, and it’s nice to see that it’s starting to fade out. The visuals in Oz were absolutely amazing. They did a great job presenting on screen the concepts that Frank L. Baum put into writing oh so many years ago. I didn’t see anything ground breaking, but what was in the film was done very well.

I thought the supporting cast did an amazing job as well. In Oz fashion, many of them had parts before and after the Wizard’s trip to Oz. Michelle Williams brought new scope to the character once made famous by Billie Burke, showing the tougher side of the ever-regal Glinda the Good Witch of the South. Joey King shows good range both as an actress and a voice talent. Bill Cobbs and Tony Cox also provide a good balance to the group of… Oz-ites? Oz-ians? Anyway, the scene-stealer throughout the movie was Zach Braff. Who did distracted you from James Franco’s sub-par performance as Frank, Oz’s assistant in Kansas, and Finley, a flying monkey who owes Oz a life-debt shortly after his arrival in this foreign land. On the other side of the good vs. evil fight was Rachel Weisz, who played Evanora (The Wicked Witch of the East) perfectly.

While the supporting cast was excellent, I felt that Disney dropped the ball with the casting of our major players. I was impressed with James Franco’s performance in 127 Hours, and really was looking forward to seeing him in this film. During the whole movie, it felt like Franco thought he was acting in one of the raunchy comedies he has become so well known for. He wasn’t horrible, but I just don’t think he was the best choice for the part.

I could say almost same for Mila Kunis as Theodora, aka The Wicked Witch of the West. Now I say “almost” because I feel like there were moments in the movie where she played the part well. But for the most part she over acted almost the entire performance. Add to that the makeup job after she made her transformation from Theodora to the Wicked Witch was sub-par. I’ve seen better makeup job’s on SyFy’s Faceoff.

All that said, I did enjoy the movie; albeit I was a little disappointed that it was not a musical as the original was (some would argue that The Wizard of Oz was not a musical, but I say any movie with 4 or more songs sung by the cast who are not part of a band is a musical). I felt that the movie had a good presentation, with a good storyline that was based on Baum’s world. Living up to The Wizard of Oz is a daunting task, and while Disney hit it out of the park with story and visual representation, it left me wandering how much better it could have been with better casting choices.

The big question I hear after I watch movies these days is: “Should I see it in theaters?” Just for the visuals alone, and the supporting cast carrying the movie on their backs, I would say yes. That said, I would still give the movie 3.5 out 5 stars.

Jack the Giant Slayer

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The timeless children’s tale of Jack and the Beanstalk gets a high-tech update in the new film Jack the Giant Slayer. Directed by Bryan Singer, the new version mixes in special effects with romance, action, and humor to provide a refreshing update of a fairytale that should appeal to adults and children alike. Nicholas Hoult stars as Jack, a simple farmer who’s raised by his uncle after the passing of his father. As a boy, Jack enjoyed the tales of long ago, especially those of the time when giants came down from the sky and attacked the earth before being thwarted by King Eric and his magical crown.

One day while in town to sell a cart and horse and earn much-needed funds for his uncle, Jack has a chance encounter with Princess Isabelle, (Eleanor Tomlinson), which leaves Jack’s starstruck. Unbeknownst to Jack and Isabelle, there is a dastardly plot afoot as the evil Count Roderick (Stanley Tucci), plots to rule the land once he has married Isabelle. The fact that the Princess has no interest in marrying Roderick is of little interest to the King (Ian McShane), as he is anxious to provide continuity for his kingdom following the loss of his wife. While Isabelle pleads her case with her father, Jack ends up in possession of beans which, he’s told, are magical.

Upon seeing what Jack has returned with, his uncle storms off into the night hoping to sell some of Jack’s remaining family possessions in order to make the money Jack had failed to acquire. While alone, Jack again encounters the Princess, who has decided to run away rather than be forced into a marriage she does not want. As if on cue, one of the magic beans that Jack had obtained earlier becomes wet in the rain storm and whisks the cottage and Princess into the heavens high above. The King and his men send a group of guards, under the leadership of Elmont (Ewan McGregor), to ascend the beanstalk and return the Princess. Jack and Roderick also accompany the soldiers, each with their own agenda.

Upon scaling the massive stalk, the group soon discovers that they are in the realm of giants long thought to be the stuff of legends. Complications arise which forces Jack to take command of the very perilous situation and soon finds himself battling not just to save the Princess but also for the very survival of the kingdom and surrounding world.

The film has some nice moments and while the CGI stuff may be a bit childish to some, it is important to remember that this is a fairytale and as such you are not going to see a lot of character depth and intricate plot twists. Instead, the film relies on a very likable cast made up of matinée quality villains and bad guys and some very nice visual effects to convey its simple but effective formula. Hoult follows up his leading role in “Warm Bodies” effectively and with several high-profile projects in the near future, seems poised to be a leading man to keep an eye on. The supporting cast does a very good job, especially McGregor and McShane who bring a gleeful energy to their roles as does Tucci as a villain who has everything short of the twirling mustache and black hat.

The 3-D offered some very good moments in the film and really enhanced some of the battle scenes in the film. Parents with younger children may want to note that there are some elements that may be frightening to very young children but for the most part this is a kid’s film. That being said, I was surprised how much I enjoyed the movie. It’s certainly better than I expected and was, in my opinion, the best live-action retelling of fairytale in recent memory. We did get a chance to review the film in the IMAX format which certainly allowed for the impressive visuals of the film to have an even greater impact. If you’ve ever been a fan of the story then you definitely will want to take a trip up the beanstalk for this nostalgic, yet highly enjoyable, interpretation of the beloved classic.

3.5 stars out of 5

Snitch

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By Rebecca Fox

I’m a huge fan of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. His wrestling persona is
extremely entertaining and he’s a pretty decent actor. He did good with this movie but it wasn’t enough.

The premise of the movie is based on ‘true events’ (whatever that
means), it’s more about a law that’s real in our country right now, I’ll get in to that later.

There are a lot of characters so stick with me. The Rock plays John
Matthews, he owns his own construction business. He has an ex-wife, Sylvie Collins played by Melina Kanakaredes, and a current wife, Analisa played by Nadine Velazquez.

Johnand Analisa
have a daughter Isabella and he has a son with Sylvie, Jason Collins played by Rafi Gavron. The other major players are Barry Pepper who plays undercover DEA agent Cooper; Susan Sarandon who plays Joanne Keeghan a US Attorney; Jon Bernthal
who plays Daniel James an ex-con trying to get his life back together; Michael Kenneth Williams who plays Malik, a drug dealer; and Benjamin Bratt who plays Cartel leader Juan Carlos. Out of all of these, I liked Daniel, Agent Cooper, John Matthews, Malik and
Joanne Keeghan, in that order.

The law the movie is based on is about mandatory minimums. If you are
holding and it’s enough to distribute then you go to jail. The length of your jail time is based on how
much you are holding when you’re caught. In this case, Jason, who is 18 and still in high
school, is set up by his ‘best friend’. This friend sends him a huge bag of ecstasy against Jason’s wishes.

When the package arrives Jason gets caught because it’s a
sting. His jail time based on the amount of ecstasy is ten years in a prison that holds murderers, rapist and violent criminals.

The movie starts excruciatingly slow, the real action doesn’t start until
almost halfway through, or at least it felt like it. It’s good once you get there but I wasn’t really into
the people in it/living it. I kept thinking of the actors as themselves not the characters
they were playing, even the ones I liked. There were too many close ups and‘in action’ scenes that involved someone with a camera running or walking next to the actor.

I getthat it was to try and build apprehension and anxiety but it was more annoying and kept pulling me out of the story so I couldn’t connect emotionally with the characters.

I didn’t believe the union between John and Analisa or that there had been one with Sylvie, there was no familiarity and I didn’t believe the love or tension between them.

John was a business man who’s never seen action so he’s kind of a wuss, but it’s the Rock, a huge tall muscle-y intense looking guy. Whenever he flinched I kept waiting for him to kick ass but he never does.

Then in another scene he’s magically badass, shooting
a shotgun one handed out of the window of a semi-truck he’s driving.

The movie was more about showing people this heinous law then entertainingus. I don’t like that, it’s not why I go to movies. The only saving grace would have been if it had been really entertaining but it was only mildly entertaining at best.

I’d say rent it if you like the Rock or if you’re curious, it wouldn’t be too much of a waste of your time but
definitely don’t waste your money in a theatre.

2.5 out of 5.

Beautiful Creatures

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By Tracey Barrientos

Hollywood has seemed to turn to books these days for inspiration to try and bring audiences the latest and greatest to the big screen. Has the industry turned to teen novels to solely follow in the footsteps of the widely known Twilight Saga success to in turn bring more money to the box office? It certainly wouldn’t be a bad idea to do so. With the success of the over saturated archetype of vampires and zombies, the path through the supernatural teen based stories has now led us to witches, or should I say casters. Based on the best selling American young adult series by Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl, Beautiful Creatures is the first novel in the best selling series. The story is based in a small conservative town of Gatlin, South Carolina and is at first about Ethan Wate (Alden Ehrenreich) a seventeen year old young man who lives with his father that is stuck in morning over the death of his wife and the house keeper Amma (Viola Davis) who is also the towns all knowing librarian. Ethan dreams and hopes that one day he will break free of the small town of Gatlin and go to college far away. Lately though, he has been having a recurring dream of a young woman waiting for him on a Civil War battlefield. Every time he is close to reaching her a lightning bolt strikes just like a gunshot and he dies. Thankfully, it is only a dream but he doesn’t seem to be able to think about anything else other than the woman in his dreams and falls in love with this mystery woman, hoping one day he will be united with the girl of his dreams.

With the beginning of the first day of school a newcomer named Lena Duchannes (Alice Englert) seems to be an outcast because of her families history. Capturing the attention of Ethan he becomes more and more intrigued with her, despite the awful things that the other classmates are saying about her. Lena is the niece of Macon Ravenwood (Jeremy Irons), the owner of the one and only mysterious Gothic Ravenwood Manor. Lena has uncontrollable powers proving that some of what her classmates have been saying is true. Lena has until her sixteenth birthday to undergo the Claiming, a process that throughout the years makes a caster go to the light side or the dark side. The film also features an allstar cast such as: Alden Ehrenreich, (“Tetro”), Emmy Rossum, Thomas Mann, Emma Thompson, Rounding out the cast are Eileen Atkins, Margo Martindale, Zoey Deutch, Tiffany Boone, Rachel Brosnahan, Kyle Gallner, Pruitt Taylor Vince and Sam Gilroy.

The film Beautiful Creatures is a supernatural love story with some of the same ideas and themes as most of these supernatural teen movies based off of best selling novels. However, Beautiful Creatures was a refreshing take on the story of two young lovers, one who is human and the other who is a supernatural being. The scenery and use of the deep southern backdrops added to the mystery of the story. I have not read the book though I plan to, I am unable to comment on how close the movie was to the book. The special effects in the film were not overdone or out of place and were appropriate to each specific scene. Some comedic relief is found throughout the film and is not out of place. The flow of the story is also flawless including the music used for the soundtrack.

This film has been rated PG-13 for violence, scary images and some sexual material. I would recommend this to audiences of a variety of ages from young teen to older adult. Yes this film may have some similarities to other teen/supernatural films but all in all it is a film I definitely would recommend to our readers and I can’t wait for the second installment.

3.5 out of 5 stars.

by Rebecca Fox

This movie is based on a book of the same name. As usual I have yet to read
the book, though I bought it after watching the movie and am halfway
through it now. A side note that’s kind of funny, when I saw the reviews
on TV I thought it was for a new TV show and didn’t pay much attention so I
really didn’t know what to expect as I sat down to watch it.

The casting I think was really good for this movie. I like how the two main
characters are relative unknowns to me and they both were good looking but
not in the stratosphere. Very normal and right for each other. Alice
Englert played Lena Duchannes, an outsider just wants to fit in and live a
normal life. It’s made impossible by her abilities as a caster and the fact
that she can’t control her powers when she gets emotional. Alden
Ehrenreich plays her love interest Ethan Wate, seemingly the most popular
boy in school but living a life on auto-pilot. His dream was to go anywhere
but the small southern town where they live.

Helping to round out the cast are Jeremy Irons who plays Macon Ravenwood,
Lena’s uncle, he’s fantastic as always. Viola Davis plays Amma, it’s hard
to label her character, she’s part house keeper, part family member, part
voodoo priestess, and she does a great job of making this character
believable. Emma Thompson plays Mrs. Lincoln and does a brilliant job of
playing a character who acts like she has a split personality but doesn’t.

I won’t explain that further so I don’t spoil anything. Lastly Emmy Rossum,
she plays Lena’s cousin Ridley Duchannes. In some parts she was so good I
forgot it was Emmy Rossum. There were some parts of her character that felt
inconsistent but I think that had more to do with the writing than the
acting. Now to the story, as I said it starts slow, mostly because we are
seeing Ethan starting his day with him narrating us into the story. There
was a lot of narrating but it does get better as the movie moves along.
Ethan and Lena share more than classes, there’s a whole history in this
town that is revealed at a good pace. The graphics that are used are
tastefully thrown in with the exception of a dining room scene, you’ll know
what I mean when you see it.

Also, I should mention there are a lot of clichés. Normally I find this
annoying but for some reason some of them didn’t feel as detached from
reality as they normally are if that makes any sense. There were some that
were typical, like the obsession with the Civil War but then there were
others. For example it’s a town that doesn’t have a star bucks but everyone
has a cell phone, breaking the middle of nowhere feel. Overall I was
charmed by this movie and entertained, some things were routine for a
coming of age, magic using, romance movie, but this did not overshadow the
story and I enjoyed the way it was told. I will be buying this for my
collection but it’s not a must see in theatres.

3.5 out of 5

Two Reviews of A Good Day To Die Hard

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By Ryan Guerra

To me, the original Die Hard (1988) was the birth of the modern action movie that we now take for granted. We have a seeming normal everyman in Bruce Willis, playing a likable but tough as nails NYPD cop John McClane, who just happens to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. (Yes, Story if his life.) The street smart hero uses whatever resources he could muster to become a thorn in the side of an intelligent and sophisticated villain, while dropping a few comedy one-liners along the way. This being the 5th installment of the Die Hard series the formula seems to be working, only not as well as past films in the series.

As a fan of the series there are many things this film does well. The soon to be 58 Willis is still as likeable as ever as John McClane. The film does a good job of making fun of his age just enough to make you feel that he is old, but not TOO old. The improbable action is as big as ever which leads to mass destruction in typical John McClane fashion. This action helps the 97min runtime feel fast paced and fun. Also Jai Courtney (Jack Reacher) plays John’s son CIA agent Jack McClane and actually plays strong against Willis. The whole father-son dynamic is interesting and gives some new depth to this familiar character. This dynamic leads up to a redeeming moment for John McClane that makes you wonder if this is Willis’s swan song in the series and if the reins are being passed to Courtney?

As a fan of the series there are many things this film does not do well. Perhaps the most notable are the lack luster one-liner jokes that always seem to stand out in the previous films. They exist, however they are not really that funny. Also the same joke was recycled over and over that by the end I do not recall laughing about anything in the final 40 mins of the film. Perhaps my biggest complaint is that the villain in this film is vanilla. So plain that I do not care to even look up his name. Just know that if you are a fan of the film he is nowhere near the Brilliance of the characters Hans Gruber or even Simon Gruber in previous films. And for this series that is a big problem. We know John McClane is a bad ass, but what is the point of all his destruction if he is not using it to stomp someone who is equally menacing.

In the end I can say that this film is a guilty pleasure that I enjoyed. It is far from a good movie but fans of the series and anyone just looking to watch a run of the mill action flick will be entertained. Leading up to this film I watch the previous four films and I have to say that this film is better than Die Hard 2: Die Harder and Live Free and Die Hard but behind the Die Hard With A Vengeance and far behind the original Die Hard. If you have never seen a Die Hard film, do yourself a favor and use the price of admission to rent the original.

3 out of 5 stars

By Joseph K. Saulnier

When I left the movie theater after having watched A Good Day to Die Hard, I was asked by what I thought. My response was this: For an action movie, it was quite good and entertaining. For a “Die Hard” movie… it was a little disappointing. Twenty-four hours later, I find that I still feel the same way.

The thing that attracted me to Die Hard was that everything that happened in the movie seemed plausible. Highly unlikely… yes, but plausible none the less. As the series progressed things became more and more realistic, but it still felt right up until the third movie that these things could actually happen to our buddy John McClane. And let’s not forget… John McClane is not a super cop. He’s not a highly trained Special Forces operative. He just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. But then we enter on Live Free or Die Hard. First off, I loved the movie. But things began to get very unrealistic in this movie and it started feeling less like Die Hard and more like [insert any action movie here]. And it seems that we get more of the same in A Good Day to Die Hard. But, like I said. I enjoyed this movie immensely. There was a lot of good humor, some misplaced references to the original movie, and plenty of action.

This time around, John McClane travels to Russia in the hopes of saving his estranged son, Jack, from a lifetime in prison. Instead, he ends up in the middle of a political and military disaster which, let’s face it, is just another day for our favorite rough and tumble detective. It’s been 25 years since we first saw McClane walking around on glass, spouting one-liners like “yippee-ki-yay, and screaming “Holly” from the floor. The big difference this time is that he’s gone international. The hugeness of this film do make it work though. From a chase scene that destroys nearly 200 cars to the helicopter attack at the end, direct John Moore has definitely given plenty of bang for your buck.

There are many who I have talked with who feel that the plot is non-existent. But I kind of wonder if people have just been desensitized to the most basic of story lines. McClane’s blood is in trouble, and he will go to extraordinary lengths to help. That was the plot of Die Hard; that is the plot of A Good Day to Die Hard. Everyone raved about the movie 25 years ago, but now it just doesn’t seem to make the cut.

Maybe it’s the realism that I mentioned earlier that bothers people. I don’t think that should affect your opinion of the plot, but maybe there’s something to be said for gun and car battles on Russian highways without anyone noticing. Or McClane driving a vehicle over a line of cars filled with passengers and no seems to care that he might have fatally hurt innocent people. The setting for the big finale that so insane that I think some of the world’s bravest dare-devils would look at it and ask, “Are you insane?” However, these quibbles are outshined by great and fun performances by the cast.

Willis continues to play the crime-stopping cop with almost sadistic glee. . He’s definitely older, but Willis still brings the same charm and vocabulary to the role he did all those years ago. And rest assured, his most famous quote is nicely tucked into the folds of all the bangs, pows and explosions. Jai Courtney is a surprisingly welcome addition who picks up a little of the action. Many of you may recognize him as Varo from Spartacus: Blood and Sand. He and Willis have the love-hate father-son relationship down pat.

Willis has said that he envisions this series kind of like James Bond. The series may not always be centered on John McClane, but any one can be in that “Die Hard” role. It will be interesting to see if they continue it after this with Jack McClane, or go whole new route. Did we need another Die Hard? Probably not, but as long as the action is thrilling, intense and fun… keep them coming.

4 stars out of 5.

Cirque Du Soliel Amaluna

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By Tracey Barrientos

The magic and mystery of Cirque Du Soleil has returned to the Seattle area right smack dab in the middle of Redmond’s Marymoor Park under a huge heated big top. The spectacular shows premise follows a young woman who lives on an island that is governed by all sorts of creatures and goddesses. The young woman Miranda falls in love with one of the men that is a part of a group of pirates that become marooned on the island.

Cirque Du Soleil always brings a more modern take on the old circus acts of juggling to juggling with fire, tight rope walking to tight rope walking with high heels, contortionists with elements of water, the use of clowns as comedy relief and many other surprises hiding around each and every corner. The show provides entertainment for the whole family with a wide array of acts, beautiful set design and costumes. It is almost hard to blink with fear of missing something magical.

Amaluna is full of spectacular set designs that embody the beautiful colors of peacocks and paradise. A big pool of water that looks almost like a goblet is placed in the center of the stage. This is where a beautiful scene takes place between the goddess of the moon and the young woman Miranda. The godess seems to be introducing Miranda to the magical wonders of the water. The scene includes contorting along with water elements, areal acts and amazing music. The revolving circular stage also provides depth to the stage and helps the audience not miss a single beat. The music of the show has a rock concert feel to it and gets your feet tapping along with the beats. Once you hear the music you will get goosebumps with the otherworldly sounds that coincide with the story.

The show made me feel as though I was having an amazing dream that I did not want to wake up from. I was just as curious as the main character Miranda who was just enthralled with all the magical performances that were happening before her. How can you not be enthralled? The costumes and makeup itself as a whole is a wonder in and of itself. Sparkles and sparkles galore will have your jaw dropping with the beauty and fascination of it all.

Once again Cirque Du Soliel has crafted a show that you and your family will not want to miss and will only be here for a limited time and because the entertainment is so extraordinary and quite the treat for the entire family you will not want to miss it. The show will take place at Marymoor Park in Redmond until March 24th. For more information and to purchase tickets be sure to visit:

Ticket Information

Have fun and I hope you enjoy the magic of the Cirque as much as I have. As a friendly reminder there is a parking fee of $15 and the seats under the bigtop are extremely close together so get ready to feel squished. There is no need to be worried about becoming cold as the big top is very well heated. Plenty of restrooms are available at the beginning of the show as well as at the intermission.

Side Effects

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By Joseph K. Saulnier

Steven Soderbergh has been toying with the notion of retirement for a couple of years now, and has said that “Side Effects” will be his final film. I certainly hope not.

As its title intones, “Side Effects” is a movie about what can happen when prescription medications, such as anti-depressants, can do at their worst, leading to anyone who taking them wishing they weren’t. The movie certainly starts out looking like a propaganda-film about how Doctor’s push these drugs onto patients as they are paid by pharmaceutical representatives to test their drugs. It seems that everyone in the film is taking meds of some form or another. The cast for the film should be a recipe for success: Jude Law, Rooney Mara, Catherine Zeta-Jones and Channing Tatum. But because of this perception, the first two-thirds of the film nearly put me to sleep. And then a twist happened that the made the plot extremely complex and worth watching. In many ways, the less said about “Side Effects,” the better. This may produce a better experience for you than I had. But here’s the basic idea of the movie:

Emily Taylor, played by Rooney Mara, is introduced when she is visiting her husband Martin (Tatum), a man convicted of insider trading who is about to be released after four years behind bars. Martin’s discharge happens uneventfully, but adjusting to the new life of poverty rehashes the depression that first plagued Emily when her husband’s prison term started. This leads to Emily crashing her car head-on into the wall of the garage in her apartment building. While in the hospital, rules force her to see psychiatrist Jonathan Banks (Law).

Up until this point, I had trouble connecting with Mara’s character. While it is revealed that she had mental problems prior to this episode, you don’t really completely grasp what it is until later in the movie. Mara seemed to be very stiff, and way too much like her emotionless character from “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.” But then we enter Jude Law. Law’s character, Banks, is friendly, approachable and caring. He is what first drew me deeper into the movie. Though, you soon discover that he is a doctor who believes in the power of drugs. This character kept me interested because I couldn’t quite nail if he was going to be an antagonist or protagonist.

Of course our dear Dr. Banks prescribes some medications to Emily and she begins showing some disturbing side effects and… The side effects lead to really terrible, bloody things which ruins careers, lives, and even drive people to madness. Or does it?

If you catch the movie, and would like to talk about it and possibly compare notes, shoot me an email at joseph@sknr.net, or you can find me on Facebook.

2 stars out of 5

Identity Thief

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Life for Sandy Patterson (Jason Bateman), is a comfortable middle class existence. He is a father of two daughters and is expecting a third child soon with his loving wife Trish (Amanda Peet). While they have financial concerns with the pending arrival of their new baby, Sandy is hoping for a bonus and promotion at his job working for a financial service company. Things take a turn for the worse for Sandy when not only does he get neither a bonus nor promotion, but he learns that his supervisors are authorizing themselves large bonus checks which he is in charge of issuing.

Sandy and his friend Daniel (John Cho), decide that enough is enough and decide to start their own company with Sandy as V.P. Although a risky move, this could be the answer to his financial needs and Sandy jumps aboard without a second thought. Enter Diana (Melissa McCarthy), a professional identity thief who packs her Florida home with all manner of items obtained via her knack for creating credit cards belonging to other people.

Sandy thanks to his unisex name, has become the latest target for Diana and in no time, finds that his credit cards are maxed out, and worst yet, he is wanted by the police. This does not sit well for his new position as a V.P. with credit issues and warrants will scare off investors. Sandy learns that the timeline for clearing his name can be extensive, so he hatches a plan after receiving a spa confirmation call from Florida. Sandy with the knowledge of the police plans to travel to Florida and bring the person who has stolen his identity to Denver to clear his name. He hopes that a promise of no prosecution will trick her into the trip and clearing his good name.

Since the film is a comedy, things naturally do not go as planned as Denise is crafty and will resort to anything from throat punches to vehicular assault to stay one step ahead of the law. Denise has run afoul of a criminal element for issuing them credit cards that she has already maxed out and they dispatch two killers to take her and anyone she is with out. As if this is not bad enough, a psycho skip tracer (Robert Patrick) is also in hot pursuit and set on capturing the large reward on Denise. What follows is a mixture of the buddy comedy formula and road trip film which more than once reminded me of the recent “Due Date”. “Identity Thief” has a great premise and cast to it, but it is saddled by long stretches that drag on. The film takes a while to get started and never seems to find a pace that works for it.

McCarthy has some great lines and moments and Bateman does a solid job as the straight main foil. The problem is, the laughs are to few and far between to justify the nearly two hour run time. This is a shame as with about 30 minutes trimmed this could have been a very tight and witty comedy but instead under director Seth Gordon best efforts, the film never reaches its potential.

2.5 our of 5

Second Review by Christopher Daniels

One of 2013′s much anticipated comedies, Identity Thief, comes to us with Jason Bateman and Melissa McCarthy at the helm. This duo takes us on a wild ride of highly improbable but incredibly amusing antics. This film delivers the funny!

The situation begins with middle-income-father-of-2.5 Sandy Patterson (Bateman) getting a phone call from what he believes to be a fraud protection agency. It’s actually Diana (McCarthy), and she is heartlessly stealing his life and money.

Diana preys on Sandy because of his unisex name. She creates a new credit card with his information, as well as a fake ID to use around town. She goes on a shopping spree and then a wild night of binge drinking, buying beverages for everyone in the bar. Say hello to a $2200.00 bar tab! This incident is not just a financial problem for Sandy, as it directly affects his new job, and potentially could ruin his whole life.

Once it is discovered that Sandy is actually the victim of identity theft, the unhelpful Detective Reilly (Morris Chestnut) sends Sandy on an adventure to bring the thief back to Colorado for an admission of guilt.

The film is well shot and directed, with excellent acting and great writing. Overall, the film delivers a few great laughs, and a lot of good laughs. The comedic timing of Bateman and McCarthy works very well in tandem with the flow of the story.

Identity Thief is about 10-15 minutes longer than it needs to be, but all-in-all, you will be very entertained. I did find myself feeling very sorry for the main character, though. Identity theft is a very serious issue, and I question the manner in which they made light of it — but the film kept me chuckling nonetheless!

This movie has some very recognizable faces, from Jon Favreau and Amanda Peet to John Cho and T.I., not to mention Robert Patrick.

With strong sexual content (no nudity), and very strong language, this is not one for the youngins. But beyond that, it’s a great film

4 out of 5 Stars (for a comedy)

Editor: Jeff Boehm

Warm Bodies

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by Joseph K. Saulnier

Considering how many movies are typically released in the first quarter of the year, Warm Bodies is by far the best movie of 2013 so far. “Zombie Love Story” was the first term that came to my mind when I was first made aware of the movie, but it is so much more than that. Part “Romeo and Juliet”, part “Zombieland”, this adaptation of Isaac Marion’s critically acclaimed young adult novel is a humorous and surprisingly fresh zombie movie that gives its own unique look at love.

R, the zombie in our “Romeo” role, is your typical walker (excuse me while I borrow terms from another hit zombie medium). He moves around without purpose, mostly spending his days at the airport. He carries “conversations” with another zombie, M, and his internal monologue certainly lets the viewer know that zombies are fully aware of what they are. As a result of their condition, they no longer have control over what they do. Nor does R try to make excuses for it; they are what they are. This is demonstrated when he and a horde of walkers attack a group of humans. In this group is Julie, who as I am sure you have guessed is our “Juliet”. R immediately falls for her and is determined to have her reciprocate the feelings. This might prove to be difficult, considering that humans and zombies at their core just want to kill each other. It is this feeling, this emotion, that humans thought zombies incapable of, that begins to change R, and other zombies around him.

After the attack, R takes Julie back to his… er, safe haven comes to mind, but it’s really just an abandoned airplane sitting on a tarmac filled with wacky items that R has collected in the time since he became a zombie. Writer/Director Jonathan Levine, who adapted Marion’s novel, has managed to create very smart, witty dialogue, but in a cute way as he did with The Wackness (which Levine also wrote). The sincerity of the dialogue in the movie keeps you interested in a growing relationship that’s way, way outside the box. There is plenty of violence in the movie too, as we see R attack a human, bite their arm, and hide their brains away for a snack later. Speaking of brain, the film explains that when a zombie eats a human’s brains, they remember our memories. This is kind of important.

Despite being a very different romantic comedy, the film also delivers a healthy horror flick. Zombies are not the only thing that is a result of the zombie outbreak. In this post-apocalyptic world there is another threat: bonies. Bonies are zombies that are so far gone they do not care anymore. They’ve given up, have peeled off their skin and attack anything with beating hearts. R says it best in the film. “Zombies do this also, but at least they are conflicted about eating it.” Even though the bonies are fully CG creations, and utterly obviously so, Levine has done it in such a way that you only get quick glances, which is a nice way to keep the PG-13 rating considering all of the blood flowing in the film.

Nicholas Hoult is fantastic in the lead role of R, and he finds a way to turn on the creepy just as easily as he can turn the funny on. Everything our “Romeo” character is supposed to be is remarkably portrayed by Hoult. Of course it helps to have a great supporting cast, Teresa Palmer strong and sweet as Julie and John Malkovich as her father who is the hardened general who is leading the human survivors.

Warm Bodies is a great zombie movie, with an excellent sound track to set the mood throughout the film. But it’s more than that. It is also a charming story of unconventional love. Telling the story from R’s point of view gives it a very fresh feel, but it’s the thought and care that Levine and the cast members put into it that make it such a superb film. Warm Bodies is a love story between woman and monster, and the screenwriting and execution delivers a charm that cannot be denied. Warm Bodies is funny, but it’s also sweet, a bit dark at times, and highly original. All of this combined makes it the first must-see film of 2013.

4.5 brains out of 5

Bullet to the Head

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Action icon Sylvester Stallone follows up his smash hit “The Expendables 2” with a turn as a New Orleans hitman on a mission of revenge in “Bullet to the Head”. Produced by Walter Hill, who brought us such classics as the “Alien” series and directed films such as “Red Heat” and “48 Hours”, his signature style is evident throughout.

Stallone plays James Bonomo, a.k.a. Jimmy Bobo, a thug with a long rap sheet and few friends. After celebrating a successful contract hit, his partner is brutally killed and an attempt is made on Jimmy’s life as well. Suspecting that they’d been setup, James reluctantly meets with a D.C. detective named Taylor Kwon (Sung Kang), who is in town to investigate the murder of his former partner. Fate forces the duo to work with one another despite Kwon’s by-the-book nature and utter disdain for James and his choice of profession. The two soon uncover a large conspiracy that threatens not only their lives but the cities very powerful and elite, making the duo the prime targets for those who will stop at nothing.

Despite having a fairly formulaic plot, the film works very well, thanks in large part to the cast. The two leads work very well with one another, and the fine supporting work by Jason Momoa and Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje really set the tone. The action in the film is intense and at times brutal but does not seem gratuitous, making it clear that the characters live in a violent world where accepting death is second nature to the urge to kill.

Stallone gives a very physical performance as the world weary James and you can tell that he went all out for the films action sequences despite the toll his body had to take. The film is based on the graphic novel “Du Plomb dans la Tête” and captures the elements of a classic film noir, with the action of a buddy cop film without pandering to many of the genre stereotypes.

While I enjoyed Schwarzenegger’s “The Last Stand” a bit more, I was very surprised at how enjoyable the film was after being underwhelmed by the trailer. In the end, if you’re a fan of Stallone, and love a good action film, then this is one you will not want to miss.

3.5 out of 5

Parker

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So I, being the girl that I am, wasn’t exactly keyed up to go and see a “shoot-em up” style action flick — you know, the kind that Jason Statham excels at? My boyfriend, however, is like most red-blooded men and found this movie right up his alley. Perhaps it was due to the fact I “owed” him from cashing in my chick-flick points and making him watch “the Painted Veil” with me the other day; perhaps it was because my choice of Redbox rentals had been rather lackluster in comparison. Either way, he was looking forward the the prospect of this movie review far more than I.

“Parker” starts off in Ohio where Jason Statham’s character (Parker) is working a job with four other men. The job seems to go off without a hitch until the end when Parker discovers an innocent man died in the process, thus starting “beef” between he and one of his partners. The apparent boss of the crooks then asks Parker to join them in another job, requiring him to give up his share of the loot to contribute to the upcoming job. Parker politely declines and, of course, this doesn’t sit too well with the crooks. As predicted, they then turn on him and Parker is left for dead on the side of the road.

As we know, Jason Statham’s characters are indestructible. I mean, this was covered in both “Crank” movies so the audience should be well-versed in how this goes down, right? Of course, Parker survives and thus starts on a path of revenge. Mob bosses are involved, hits are put out, etc. Regardless, his journey takes him to Palm Springs where the four crooks who betrayed him are preparing for their next big job.

Now, you’re probably wondering where Jennifer Lopez is in all of this (yes, JLo has a part in this movie – I know, I feel your pain too). Given that her last decent flick was “the Cell” and “Selena,” I wasn’t expecting too much from her character. As Parker is making his way down to Palm Springs, the movie then focuses on JLo’s character, a depressed and rather broken divorcee living with her mother and desperate for a commission from her job as a real-estate agent. Cue in Parker, dressed as a wealthy Texan, and looking to buy a home in Palm Springs. Of course we see JLo checking him out and basically throwing herself at him because, well, that’s what all us desperate women do, right? We throw ourselves at rich men when times are hard without taking much else into consideration (like, say the cop – who comes across as a decent guy – who wants nothing else but to date her. But hey, he’s not Jason Statham, right? Pfft!). Regardless, JLo finds a way to weasel herself into helping Parker’s character and thwarting the four thieves who betrayed Parker. Luckily for all of us, JLo advances are shut down and we don’t have to fall witness to another “Gigli”.

Is the movie some amazing cinematic masterpiece? Absolutely not. Are Parker’s flashbacks cheesy and annoying? Of course. But we are talking about an action flick and one that doesn’t disappoint in lots of blood, gun fights, knifing action, and Jason Statham being an overall badass.

Will your girlfriend love this movie? Probably not. Will you, you red-blooded hunk of testosterone, love this movie? Probably. It is, after all, geared towards your sex. And, just in case the blood and fights don’t do it for you, there are more than enough exposed breasts throughout the film keep your interest piqued.

So if you’re looking for a good revenge-style action flick, this one is decent enough. It won’t win any awards, but it won’t leave your poor girlfriend screaming for the hills either. JLo’s performance, however, that’s just inexcusible….

3 stars out of 5

Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters

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In 2009, writer/director by Tommy Wirkola gained a cult following with his Zombie splatter film “Dead Snow”. Hollywood took notice and he was awarded with a larger budget and bigger stars for his follow up film “Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters”. The film chronicles the fairytale brother and sister duo after they escaped the gingerbread house and started hunting down witches. Originally supposed to be released in 2012, the film was pushed back to a January 2013 release in hopes of generating more buzz on Jeremy Renner’s rising star. When the film was complete, Renner had yet to appear in last year’s films “The Avengers” and “The Bourne Legacy”. A good strategy, if the standard TV trailers did not make this movie look worse than it actually is.

I have to be honest. I went into this movie expecting it to be terrible. Personally I do not have much faith in Renner (Hansel) as a leading man. I know he is somewhat hot right now but to me he is best as a supporting role. I also have only seen Gemma Arterton (Gretel) in “Clash of the Titans” (2010) where she was nothing more than a pretty face in that lack luster film. Perhaps it was because of such low expectations that together they worked. They were both “bad ass” as the brother sister bounty hunters. Not spectacular performances or anything but easily entertaining and likeable performances.

The story follows the duo as they attempt to hunt down some missing children form a small village that is troubled by witches. Famke Janssen (Taken 2) leads the supporting cast as Leader of the witches who is trying to cast a spell that will make the witches stronger than ever. The three clash it out and that is basically the story.

From a stylistic standpoint fans of Wirkola’s films will not be disappointed. The dark and grim fairytale world he creates is charming and helps us fall into the fantasy. Furthermore this film has several gruesome scenes that are shockingly comical in the way they are over the top. At no point do they feel unnecessary for shock value, but rather they happen in a way that seems normal and plausible in the world we are shown on film. Additionally the pacing of this film is fast. There was not a dull moment as the 88 minute run time is one action or story driven transition to the next. Together these aspects help the film feel fun, lighthearted and surprisingly entertaining. Also the 3D effects help the film and do not seem distracting.

The finished product accomplishes something that other fast paced ridiculous action flicks do not. It keeps it simple. Tommy Wirkola shows his talent by keeping various stylistic factors and pacing together in a way that makes the simplistic story complete. Often times in films like this there comes a point where your suspended disbelief is tested beyond its limits. But that is not the case here. Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters delivers an entertaining fast paced movie that the TV previews do not to justice. If you are a fan of zombies, vampires, witches or any other supernatural type characters then you will not want to miss this film.

3.5 stars out of 5

The Last Stand

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It’s 2013 and Arnold Schwarzenegger is back in his first leading role in 10 years in
“The Last Stand”
Directed by legendary South Korean director Kim Ji-w oon, The Last Stand stars
Schwarzenegger as Ray Owens, a former LAPD narcotics officer who has left the
violence and bloodshed of the big city to become the sheriff of a sleepy border town
in Arizona called Sommerton Junction where the biggest crime is the town’s mayor
parking in the firezone on main street.

Meanwhile in Las Vegas, Gabriel Cortez, the most vicious and ruthless drug lord
since Pablo Escobar, stages a spectacular escape from FBI custody and takes off
in a stolen/modified Chevrolet Corvette C6ZR1.

With a FBI agent held hostage and a group of mercenaries, Cortez races towards
the Mexican border at over 200 mph and Sommerton Junction. Counted out by the FBI
and the military as just another ‘small town sheriff’ with a group of inexperienced
deputies, Sherriff Owens reluctantly accepts the truth that the only thing standing
between Cortez and his escape and the safety of the people of Sommerton Junction is
Ray.

Co-starring Forrest Whitaker, Johnny Knoxville, Jaimie Alexander, Luis Guzman,
Peter Stormare, and Genesis Rodriguez, “The Last Stand” is a great action film
with an ensemble cast that follows the formula of the ‘action film’ but follows it
well. A basic/solid plot with plenty of spectacular stunts and explosions. After the
first 5 minutes, you don’t have a chance to leave the theater. The story unfolds
quickly, and you really don’t have the chance to look away. With plenty of comic
relief (most of it courtesy of Johnny Knoxville and Luis Guzman) and no romantic
scenes (except for one or two couples lip locking) I though the movie was a great
film. After 10 years, it was honestly a relief to see Schwarzenegger back in movies
as the lead and as part of an ensemble cast.

If there is one thing you can count on,
it is because Arnold always delivers when it comes to action movies no matter the scale,
and after so much time in politics it doesn’t look like he’s skipped a beat
and it’s a great escape from the winter chaos outside.

Welcome back Mr. Schwarzenegger!

3.5 stars out of 5